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After deciding while spending the night with his wife, Leonidas meets the soldiers assembled for his departure to Thermopylae, and finds that only thirteen were accepted in the army due to stringent requirements. Among them are Captain, his son Sonio, and a slightly unfit Spartan named Dilio. Once at the Hot Gates, they encounter a deformed Paris Hilton, who tells Leonidas and the Captain about a secret goat path above the Hot Gates that Xerxes could use to outflank the Spartans. When she asks to be made a Spartan soldier, Leonidas rejects her as unqualified because she cannot use a spear correctly. Leonidas and his platoon soon face off with Xerxes' messenger and his Immortals, beating them in a dance contest before driving them off a cliff. Xerxes, impressed, personally approaches Leonidas and attempts to bribe him with a trip to the Palms Hotel and Casino. Leonidas declines, and the Spartans face the Persian army in a "Yo Momma" fight, which the Spartans win, but Dilio has his eyes scratched out and wanders away.




Meet the Spartans


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Deciding to betray the Spartans, Hilton tells Xerxes where the goat path is in return for various gifts and for having her deformed hump removed. Xerxes meets the twelve remaining Spartans and the war begins. Meanwhile, back in Sparta, Queen Margo has several confrontations with Traitoro, as he is the vital vote in sending more troops to assist her husband. Following her address to the council, Traitoro publicly betrays the Queen, who then battles him in a parody of Spider-Man 3 and defeats him using a dust buster. With Traitoro's deceit exposed, the council is united with the queen.


In addition to the festivities at the NSU practice field, Saturday will also serve as the annual kickoff event for the Spartan Youth Club. A cookout with inflatable games for children will be held from 1-3 p.m. at the Spartan picnic area adjacent to Dick Price Stadium. The club is open to any youth in the eighth grade or younger. Registration for the 2011-12 year is $5, which includes a T-shirt, membership ID which grants free access to home athletic competitions, special meet-and-greet sessions with the athletes, and much more. For more information on the youth club, call Jackie Nicholson at (757) 823-8751 or download a membership application at www.nsuspartans.com.


Michigan State football invited students and fans to Spartan Stadium to meet the team on Monday, August 23, 2021. During the open practice, fans watched the players run drills and scrimmage, green versus white.


The River Cities' Reader, started in 1993, is independently and locally owned. We publish a monthly printed tabloid size magazine, available for free throughout the Quad Cities at over 300 locations. The Reader provides keys to the Quad Cities' culture in print and online with exhaustive event calendars and coverage of arts, music, theatre, festivals, readings, lectures, meetings, exhibits, museums, dance, sports and classes for all ages. Commentaries on business and politics, locally written theatre and movie reviews, advice columns, astrology, cartoons and crosswords are also published in print monthly, and refreshed daily, online.


MARYVILLE, Mo. - The Southwestern Community College track & field team continued its strong start to the season Saturday with four more school records and one meet record at the Northwest Open hosted by Northwest Missouri State University.


In finals, Cunningham had a strong start out of the blocks and then pulled away from the field 30 meters into the race. Cunningham crossed the finish line clear of any other competitors and turned to face the video board for results, dropping to his knees when his time of 6.77 seconds flashed on the screen. He was swarmed by teammates congratulating him. His time of 6.77 seconds tied the Northwest Open meet record and currently ranks him sixth in the NJCAA. Through four races in two meets this year, Cunningham remains undefeated in the 60 meter dash.


Later in the meet, Cunningham took more than 1 second off his indoor PR in the 200 meter dash, finishing fifth in 22.31 seconds. He concluded the meet by running down Truman State on the anchor leg of the 4x400 relay with a 51.4 split to help Southwestern win its heat in a time of 3:31.72 and finish ninth overall. Other members of the relay team were Robert Norton (51.9 split), Jonathon Hackett (54.2), and Chase Oates (54.0).


"Justin was an absolute machine for us on Saturday," said Scott Vicker, director of cross country/track & field. "We had this meet circled, knowing he would finally get some competition in the 60 meter dash that could better push him to his max potential. We finally got to see that in finals, and I still think he has room to go lower with his time. I'm super proud of how he ran the 4x400. He hasn't run that distance since his second meet as a Spartan back in 2021. For him to run as well as he did, after having already run three races, is a testament to how hard he has worked and how much he has bought into my vision for him. He wouldn't have been able to handle that kind of workload in a meet last year, so he has come a long way." 041b061a72


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